So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
