It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
