You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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