I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
People in love make me want to vomit
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
