it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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