We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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