if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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