i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
