They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
