I bet he comes in French.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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