my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
