okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
