it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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