and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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