Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize