I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
