Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
