You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Randomize
