I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
