I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
you will always have a special place in my vag
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Randomize
