Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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