bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
