My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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