Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
