I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
