Apparently you make a good broom.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
