i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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