She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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