If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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