Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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