he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Actions speak louder than pants.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
