I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Randomize
