Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
