I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
