if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
In America we eat man semen.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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