I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
