the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
