I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
