I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
