No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
