Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
