You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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