He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
