I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
