how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
