I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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