She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
