the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
