ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
is wine microwaveable?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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