You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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